Dogs, the loyal companions, true soulmates, trusted friends, unconditional lovers and in many cases are the first child of the family. Dogs have been part of families for centuries and if you are a pet parent you would easily relate when I say, they complete us in many ways and teach us what giving in true sense is. So what really changes when we are expecting?
If you are at the verge of giving your dog away, having sleepless nights, arguments with your spouse and family. Paranoid about what happens when the baby is here. STOP!!
Take a deep breath, calm your self down and know that you are at the right place. The current apple of your eye doesn't really have to go. All that is needed is a bit of readjustment, preparation and above all patience.
A few years ago I was going through the same struggle, I was pregnant with our first and everyone around us cautioned against the dog. Few even suggested we give the dog away before the arrival of our son. For us she was our first born, we had her (pepper, a female GSD) for years and knew it would be difficult but for us giving her up was out of the question.
Many don't believe it when I say my dog knew I was pregnant, she sensed something was different and kept sniffing my belly throughout my pregnancy, was extra gentle and very protective of me those 9 months. She never troubled me, walked extra slow on walks and almost like she knew what I was going through even before I did.
We spoke to our doctor who asked us to keep the dog away from the baby for the first few weeks to see if our son develops any allergies or symptoms and even if he did he assured us that the baby will develop stronger immunity than others without pets. I believe him now that my son is 2 years old and has a fairly good immunity.
Our dog was not allowed in our son's bedroom or anywhere close to him the first few weeks, my dog understandable was very upset and curious as to why all of a sudden certain sections of the house were off limits. But eventually we realised our son was doing just fine, so we brought them closer and now our dog was sleeping right under his crib and are practically inseparable ever since.
Our dog changed with the arrival of the baby, the first few weeks she was jealous and felt very sad, the next few once she was close to him was very protective and cared so much for him. She would run to us the minute he made a sound, she was our baby monitor.
It is tough taking care of a newborn and a dog who needs to be walked three times a day, fed, bathed and looked after but whenever I was up in the wee hours to feed the baby while everyone else in the house was asleep, there she was right by me keeping and eye on both of us and assuring us that we were not alone in it.
So How Did We Do It?
We split the chores, my husband cared for our first - our day and I cared for our newborn. During the first few weeks while I was settling into motherhood, we took all the help we could from friends, family, parents with cooking, cleaning, running errands but eventually over the weeks and months my husband and I got into a comfortable rhythm and things got so much better and fell in place.
Take turns to care of the baby and the dog with your partner. If you can afford for the first few months get help - cook, dog walker, maid whatever works for you.
Don't push your dog away or get too paranoid as that will not help, the dog will feel jealous and confused when all of a sudden it is treated differently. Give your dog time settle into the new normal and changes.
Start setting boundaries, putting up baby things so your dog knows something is up.
Keep her favourite treats and toys handy so on the days she is upset and you need her to understand and behave you can use them.
Transition your dog chores (feeding, walking, grooming, play time) and things you usually did to your husband gradually so way before the baby comes your dog would already be accustomed to less attention from you. But don't completely shun her off, she needs you too so strike a balance.
While hygiene for newborn is crucial, don't stress out as more often than not as new parents we go over board and trust me when I tell you this, the dog being in the same room as the baby is not a cause for concern but take care not to ever leave them two alone unsupervised.
When you are about to lose it and just want to give up, think about the times when your dog made you feel happy and complete. It's just a phase and this too shall pass.
For the dog, you are her everything and your baby in no time will be her world too. Give her time to accept the new member.
It takes time, practice and patience from everyone in the family including the dog but eventually you'll get there and be proud of what you accomplished without having to let go. Even after all this if you have made up your mind and absolutely can't stand your dog anymore, find her a loving home and give her time to adjust with the new family.
Like many cases we hear today, kindly don't abandon the dog in the middle of nowhere or leave her tied to a post. Trust me when I say this as someone who has lived with dogs throughout her life that they can understand your emotions, read your intentions and still out of their unconditional love for you trust you and wait for you to come back. While brining one life into your world, don't break the heart of another life that once you loved and were her whole world. While in the heat of the moment we may do things which we will regret for years to come. Choose the option that works best for everyone including the dog who is/was once the apple of your eye.
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